I have been saying for some time that women need to understand that men are visual creatures. They want to see you in frilly, lacy and sexy colored bra, panties and nighties. I have had a fair amount of pushback from certain women who are clearly not comfortable with their sexuality. I have had some extremely negative comments on another site recently over this idea.
Ladies, it is your relationship. By refusing to wear what men like, you tell them that their feelings are not important to you and that you don’t care how they feel. Are you really sure that you want to continue the man feeling this way?
Sexy Lingerie for Every Stage of Your Love Life
Whether you’re single, dating, post-breakup, pregnant or in a relationship, we’ve got hot lingerie picks for you.
-Faye Brennan, brought to you by PinpointsX.com
It’s something that isn’t really talked about, but we know it’s true. There’s lingerie for every aspect of your life and phase of your relationships. After all, the lingerie you wear at the start of a love affair isn’t necessarily going to be what you wear when you’ve been together for five years and have a baby. And who hasn’t devoted a section of their underwear drawer to first-time-with-a-new-guy bra and panty sets?
We consulted with Jennifer Carroll, co-author of the new book, Underneath It All: A Girl’s Guide to Buying, Wearing, and Loving Lingerie ($11.16, Harlequin), to come up with a guide to lingerie that matches your relationship status. Whether you’re single, seriously involved or happily married, here are your options:
Single and Not Seeing Anyone Right Now
So what if no one else will see your underwear? “Dress for the love life you want, not the one you’ve got,” advises Carroll. Here are some simple pieces that you can wear on a solo night at home to make you feel more sensual and in touch with your feminine side without feeling ridiculous. Looks like this will give you an extra boost of confidence, “just in case you meet Mr. Right,” says Carroll.
Single and Dating
When you’re dating but not fully committed to someone, it’s a good idea to keep the more complicated items safe in your naughty drawer until things start getting serious. For the time being, stick with classy yet sexy separates. “Make sure your bra and panties match,” says Carroll. “Your date will appreciate the effort!” And in these styles, he’ll want to stick around to see what else you’ve got in your repertoire.
From left: Pin Dot Mesh Ruffled Bra ($7, charlotterusse.com) and Polkadot Boyshort Panties ($3, charlotterusse.com). Felina: Harlow Full Busted Demi Bra ($32, barenecessities.com) and Felina: Harlow Low Rise G-String ($14, barenecessities.com). Flirty Lace Balconette Bra in pink ($16.80, express.com) and Flirty Lace String Thong in pink ($12.50, express.com)
In a Relationship
Now that you’ve found someone, it’s time to up the ante. If you’re in a relatively new relationship, don’t bother with complicated closures and ties because your guy won’t wait long enough to delicately take these pieces off of you. Instead, stick with pieces that are hotter than your average bra and panty set, but are just as easy to remove. Carroll likes the simple addition of a garter belt and stockings, too. “Add them to any bra and panty set to heat things up on date night,” she says.
Sexy Lingerie for Every Stage of Your Love Life
He proposed! Or you proposed! Either way, now’s the time to show your fiancé what he’s committed to for the rest of his life – and that’s you in all your sexy glory. Carroll says, “Engage him with the promise of things to come in bustiers, corsets and thigh-highs.” He will instantly know he’s made the right choice when he sees you in one of these scandalous little numbers.
Married or Living Together
Sure, the honeymoon may be over, but that doesn’t mean you should retire your collection of negligees. The bedroom only gets boring if you let it, says Carroll. “Ditch the fun run T-shirt for sleeping and go for a silky chemise or gown. Also, invest in some lacy, racy bras and a fantasy outfit — like a naughty maid — for dress-up!”
When you’re expecting, there are going to be times when the last thing you feel is sexy. But you’d be surprised how cute little outfits like these can instantly lift your mood and make you feel like your pre-preggers self again. Plus, daddy-to-be will be happy to see that you’re embracing motherhood and the flattering glow that comes with it. “Look for babydolls that have support for your ample bust and room for your growing tummy” in order to look your best, suggests Carroll.
From left: Eve Alexander Maternity Lace Bralette and Boyshort Set ($26.99, target.com). Giselle Babydoll ($23.80, passionspice.com). KeKoqueta Edge Lace Maternity Camidoll Set ($69.95, stellamaternity.com)
Your relationship may not have lasted, but your sex appeal shouldn’t die along with it. As Carroll says, “Out with the old, in with the new! New lingerie, that is.” Be the sex kitten that you were destined to be and experiment with lingerie you never thought you’d wear in a million years. “Wear sexy boudoir pieces that inspire hot dates; embroidered lace bra and panty sets, sheer mesh chemises, or risqué teddies,” says Carroll. Life is short, so live it up!
From left: Sheer Dress with Attached Garters and Stockings ($14.89, glamorose.com). Romantic Lace Bra and Garter Set ($24.95, bodybyvenus.com). Chantilly Black Lace Deep V Halter Teddy ($27.95, flirtcatalog.com)
Faye Brennan is assistant editor at BettyConfidential.