Marriage Is About Sharing, Share This Funny Post With Someone You Love

June 5, 2012

Thanks to Dennis one of my readers for sharing this humorous story. Enjoy and blessings on you and yours. John Wilder

A little some thing to lighten your day.

The old man placed an order for one hamburger, French fries and a 
drink. 

He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing one 
half in front of his wife.

He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two 
piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife. 

He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down 
between them. As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people 
around them were looking over and whispering. 

Obviously they were thinking, ‘That poor old couple – all they can afford is 
one meal for the two of them.’

As the man began to eat his fries a young man came to the table and 
politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple. The old man said, 
they were just fine – they were used to sharing everything. 

People closer to the table noticed the little old lady hadn’t eaten a bite. 
She 
sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping 
the drink.. 

Again, the young man came over and begged them to let him buy 
another meal for them. This time the old woman said ‘No, thank you, we 
are used to sharing everything.’

Finally, as the old man finished and was wiping his face neatly with the 
napkin, the young man again came over to the little old lady who had yet 
to eat a single bite of food and asked ‘What is it you are waiting for?’ 

She answered

‘THE TEETH.’


Sexual Advice For Single Women

April 1, 2012

This is a repost of an older blog when I was not getting nearly as many page views. I re print for your
encouragement. Tomorrow my blog will go over 85,000 page views, yea me and thanks to all my readers.

Blessings on you and yours
John

It is no wonder that you women are more confused than ever. You have been bombarded by multiple conflicting messages about sex and relationships. In a case of “Art Imitating Life” the TV show entitled: Sex in the City demonstrated women’s sense of conflictedness about sex and relationships. They proved to be ultimately clueless and tended to reinforce their own stereotypes. Carrie, the supposed expert on sex based upon her column was just as clueless about men and relationships as the rest of her girlfriends. This illustrates a problem in our society. We do not have any male advice columnists. If you are having trouble with a man, does it not make sense that you would go to a man for advice and counsel? The problem is, is that there are no nationally published male advice columnists.

I have confronted women’s magazine editors over the issue that their advice to women is always written by women. Invariably, these advice writers rarely confront women to tell them that they are doing anything wrong or damaging to their relationship with their man. What you get effectively from these writers is that they pat women on the bottom and reassure them that they are fine and it is the man’s fault. I will address this further in another chapter on how the feminists and the media are ruining your sex life. I will also explain the word MISANDRY in that chapter. It is a word and a concept that you really need to become familiar with and to be proactive in combating.

I differ from women advice columnists in that I am equal opportunity proponent. I take on men when they need to be confronted, and I take on women as well. I explain how each hurts their relationship, wittingly or unwittingly. If you really want to learn things and make things better in your relationship and are willing to hear critique, then I am your guy. If you just want me to be patronizing and pat you on the fanny and tell you that you are wonderful, don’t read my column.

Not only will I take on the feminists and the media, I will take on the church as well. I can do this because I was formerly a Baptist minister.

The church ignores the sexual issues that are contained in the Bible. There are numerous positive messages in the Bible about sex. There is even a school for sex mandated in the New Testament for women in how to love their husbands that you never hear preached or taught on.

According to the Bible, sex is a gift from God. All you ever hear in church are the “thou shall nots” about sex, you never hear any positive messages on sex or the positive commands about sex in the Bible.

You can’t trust the media either. All they ever want to do is print the sensational and the salacious. Truth is rarely found in the pages of the media. For example, according to the media, they often quote: “The world’s oldest profession” is prostitution. This is not even close to being true. If the media had any integrity, and believe me they don’t, they would tell you about all of the other professions that came before prostitution. You can find these professions listed in the Bible in succession: Shepherd, farmer, contractor, rancher, musician, blacksmith, hunter, boat-builder, winemaker, well digger and then prostitution. None of that of course is sensational and would not sell newspapers, so they sacrifice truth for sensationalism, expediency and profits. Trust nothing that you read in print without checking it out with numerous other sources.

Now let me give you some very important advice about sex and men, especially if you are single. Sex in dating has become so devalued that it is looked on as little more than a good night kiss. It is not a question of if, but only when you have sex with a guy you are dating.

I submit to you that you need to become much more selective about engaging in sex. Women have adapted the practice of having sex with the guy and hoping for the best. You are invariably disappointed. You are looking for that “knight in shining armor” to sweep you off of your feet. You want the “happily ever after” of love marriage and children. I submit to you that you need to get to know early on what the man is all about and what his goals are in terms of love and marriage. Often guys are just looking to have fun with a woman and have casual sex. In other words, many of them are just looking to get laid. You need to get rid of those guys before you ever let them into your bed and into your pants. You really don’t want to just be used as someone’s piece of ass.

Too many of you are so taken with romance that you don’t want to ask any hard questions up front, to your own detriment. The problem is, that for every guy that you sleep with that does not develop into a relationship, you become a little harder, more jaded and cynical and less trusting. You must guard your heart and your body. We have epidemic venereal diseases today, some of which are lifelong, or even fatal. Before you let that guy into your pants, you need to see a very recent negative Aids test and testing for all other venereal diseases like Herpes. I know that sounds very cold and unromantic, but I am trying to be pragmatic here and protect you. You need to protect yourselves. Any guy worth having will not have a problem with doing this for you. If he is unwilling, run the other direction.

The other thing is that you want to know that he has a good job that he can provide for your family. You also want to know if he is seriously marriage and family minded. What kind of father does he aspire to be? These are questions that you need to have answered before you ever engage in sex with him. If he passes on all of these questions and you are still considering sleeping with him and he still wants to be with you, he needs to pass one final test before you have sex with him. You need to ask him to read the part of this book that teaches men how to make love with you. Sadly, there is no “SCHOOL FOR SEX FOR MEN” out there to teach them how to make love with you and satisfy you. You already know from experience that what I am saying is true. Most men are just clueless about making love with a woman. Even if he is reasonably okay in bed, reading my instructions will make him fantastic in bed. Don’t you want to have a great sex life? So bottom line is to have him read my instructions and reassure you that he is willing to follow those directions in bed. If he does this, then have sex with him. This will take 3 or 4 dates to find this information out. You could take matters into your own hands and go online to dating sites and put all of this in your profile. You don’t need to date a lot of men, you need to date a few quality men that are already pre-screened by your clear description of what you are looking for in a man that is contained in your profile. Yes, I know that it will scare a lot of men off. That is my idea. You don’t need the men that it will scare off, you need the men who read it and it makes sense to them. We have a model of what a good man should look like in the Bible as listed in the following verses:

Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church, and gave himself for it;…so men out men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loves his wife loves himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourishes and cherishes it, even as the Lord the church;…For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh…Nevertheless, let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; Ephesians 5: 25,28,29,31,33

Likewise you husbands, dwell with them according to the knowledge, giving honor unto the wife as the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life that your prayers might not be hindered. I Peter 3:7

Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walks about, seeking who he may destroy. I Peter 5:8

I would even encourage you to put these scriptures in your profile in describing the kind of man that you are looking for. You are then again by using these scriptures in your profile pre-screening guys that are not seriously marriage minded.

I know that you still dream of the “happily ever after”. According to David Popenoe and Barbara Dafoe Whitehead who are co-directors of the Marriage Project at Rutgers University, they have found the following factors yield the best chance at long-lasting satisfying marriage: having similar goals and interests, know each other well but don’t live together before they get married, come from intact families, marry after age 25, and are not expecting a child, similar in age, race, religion, political beliefs, education, intelligence and values. The payoff of a good marriage is personal happiness, more and better sex than singles, economic success, health and long life, and very positive benefits for the children.

This is the kind of advice that I have given to single women in my family. If you follow it, you have a much higher chance of having “happily ever after”.


Here Are 10 Compliments To Give To Your Woman

March 16, 2012

10 Great Sexy Things About Women
Ten Sexy Things About Women
1. Her mouth. Wonderful thing that mouth that is so good at kissing you and making you all happy And horny. How wonderful it feels when she takes us into that mouth.
2. Her hair. I love to play with a woman’s hair. I love to get my face in it and I love it when she strokes across my naked body. I love how it smells.
3. Her breasts. Well you guys can extol at length over a woman’s breasts. We never tire of looking at them, sucking on them, feeling them against our backs, against the back of our arm when she is standing close, feeling them in our hands or again stroking them against our member.
4. Her butt. Do you ever tire of squeezing her butt cheeks in your hands, or looking at it in jeans or better yet in a short skirt or feel it against you doing it doggy style?
5. Her legs, yes especially when she is wearing high heels. Those calves make us want to melt, especially well shaved legs that are so silky to the touch.
6. Her heart which can forgive us for so much, and when it melts when we do something romantic for her.
7. Her vagina. Okay guys you know it is the promised land and heaven this side of earth when it is given to us freely and lovingly.
8. Her lingerie, the frillier and lacier the better. Most men would rather see their woman in frilly lacy lingerie than see her naked, especially when she flashes you when she gets into a car that we have opened for her in a short skirt.
9. Her whole body when it comes to hugging, sleeping next to us or cuddled up. Can anything feel so right, I don’t think so.
10. The way that she completes us. Admit it guys, you are never truly happy when you are totally single. We just are meant to have a woman of our own, God made it that way.

Tell that woman that you love her today and that you appreciate her and that you are glad to have her in your life. It will fill up her love bank.

Blessings on you and yours


Great Sex Techniques for Men To Become a Hero In the Bedroom

February 22, 2012

Sexual Foreplay and After Play, Be a Hero In The Bedroom

FOREPLAY AND AFTERPLAY

As a marriage, relationship, and sexual coach, I can’t believe how much lousy sex is happening out there. Maybe you are experiencing less than great sex with the man in your life or past men in your life. As a man speaking in defense of men, there is really no place for men to learn how to give our partners great sex. There is no SCHOOL FOR SEX out there. We all know where the body parts go, but men for the most part do not adequately understand a woman’s sexuality and how to give you fantastic sex. It is for this reason that I am writing this article. If you share this article with the man that you care about and tell him that you would really like to experience these things and ask him to do them with you, I promise, you will have better more enjoyable sex.

In conversations with women, I have come to understand that you need a transition period from the rat race to moving towards making love with your man. Most of you don’t have an “instant on” like men.

1. Brushing Hair Now I realize that for most of you, you are not necessarily going to get sexually aroused from having your hair brushed. What it does however is to give you that transition time to move towards sexual availability. The act of having your hair brushed is very pleasurable and releases endorphins in the brain. You feel pampered and that pampered feeling then causes you to have affectionate feelings towards your man. Five to ten minutes of hair brushing is a wonderful way to decompress from the daily grind. Animals instinctively groom each other and is something that we should do more. Your life will be better with more tactile stimulation.

2. Head to Toe Massage This technique has worked for me with every partner that I have ever been with. It is so effective as an arousal technique that I had an ex wife who would not make love with me unless I gave her a massage first. I start by stoking and lightly scratching a woman’s scalp with my fingernails. I then proceed from her neck all the way down to her feet. I spend more time massaging a woman’s butt like I am kneading bread. You have nerve endings in your butt that you did not even know that you have. I have never failed getting a woman wet from massaging her butt. I go on down and spend time massaging her feet. There is good reason for this. All of the nerve endings in your body terminate in your feet. By massaging the feet, you stimulate and wake up all of the nerves in a woman’s body. It prepares the rest of her body to be stimulated and aroused.

3. Let Your Man Undress You But Stop Him at Bra and Panties. (Author’s aside: So many of you out there are wearing utilitarian underwear, white nylon panties with no lace and a functional bra. Men get turned on visually, make sure that you have lacy and frilly bras and panties. Would you want a present that was not nicely wrapped or a cake with no frosting on it? Men need to see you in lacy and frilly lingerie.) The logic behind the man undressing you and having you stop him at bra and panties is to slow him down. The act of undressing you is a turn on for both of you as well. I tell my clients sex feels good, why rush it. Far too many men treat lovemaking like they do masturbation, they want to get it over in a hurry. Once you are down to bra and panties, have him continue a different variation of massage by lightly and slowly running fingertips up and down your entire body on both sides. This is incredibly arousing for you.

4. Lightly Stroke Nipples Through The Bra The idea behind keeping those bras and panties on and slowing down also reminds us of a bygone time in high school where we were furtively fondling. It adds to the excitement. Having your man lightly stroking your nipples through the bra gets them erect. Then let him slide his hand inside the cup of the bra before you allow him to remove your bra, all the while kissing you. Then he can remove the bra and proceed to more vigorous stimulation of your breasts and nipples by sucking them hard and fondling your breasts.

5. Stimulate you and stroke you through your panties Have him lightly stoke the midline of your vagina back and forth through your panties. Then have him blow hot breath through the panties over your clitoris. The warmth of his breath and the pressure of his lips on your mound through the panties is wonderfully arousing. Then have your man hook a finger inside the leg band of your panties and have him run his finger up and down inside the leg-band of the panties on both sides without actually touching your vagina. This will have you becoming very aroused and getting wet. After a few minutes of him doing this, then you can let him slide his hand inside your panties. It is not only arousing but brings back those memories of heavy petting in high school or maybe even junior high for some of you. After an extended session of this, then have him pull your panties off very slowly. The slow removal of panties is very erotic and sensual. If you really want to turn it up a notch and get passionate, have him literally rip your panties off by hooking his hand in the waistband and with one very strong yank, literally rip them off of you. What you lose by the panties being ruined, you gain in tremendous arousal. Every partner that I have ever done this with has gotten incredibly turned on because of the fear and the excitement that the act engenders in them. Most women like to be taken forcefully sometimes by a strong confident man.

6. Vaginal Penetration with the Tongue. Most men naturally go for your clitty (author’s slang term for clitoris. It sounds much cuter and not so damned clinical). Instead ask him to run his tongue up and down between your vaginal lips and then have him penetrate your vagina repeatedly with his tongue. You will find this incredibly arousing and better prepares your clitty for stimulation with his tongue.

7. Clitty Stimulation Techniques Instead of licking your clitty right away, have him gently pull back the foreskin (yes the hood over your clitty is analogous to a man’s foreskin on an uncircumcised penis.) He then can suck on your clitty like he is sucking a milkshake though a straw. This will cause your clitty to swell from engorging with blood similar to a man getting an erection. It will actually lengthen and grow in circumference similar to a man’s erection. He then can move up and down like you do giving him a blow job. It is a clitty blow job and feels wonderful. After a few minutes of that he can use what I call the “machine gun tongue”. This is a super fast stroking of your clitty with his tongue that will give you powerful orgasms. The way to do that is to have him flex his tongue against his upper lip to use as a spring and forcefully flick his tongue past that upper lip onto your clitty. This enables him to move his tongue much faster simulating a vibrator. For even more stimulation, have him growl like a bear while he is doing this. The act of growling makes his vocal cords vibrate which will then transmit those vibrations through his tongue onto your clitty.

8. Multi-sensory Inputs As you know, most women are better at multi-tasking than are men. Lovemaking is one area where you would benefit by encouraging your man to multi-task. While he is licking and sucking on your clitty, he can be penetrating your vagina with his fingers in and out with one hand and rolling your nipple around in his fingers with the other hand. The additional stimuli you will find very arousing. There is a precedent for this. Phil Spectre pioneered what he called the “Wall of Sound”. This technique involved adding multiple tracks of sound for a lusher musical auditory experience. Chefs use what they call “Adding layers of Flavor”. The point is, the multi-sensory inputs mean better pleasure for you just like in cooking and music.

9. Anal Stimulation Many people view this as a taboo. That is too bad because there are incredible pleasure nerve endings in the anus. This is of course when you want to be squeaky clean maybe just after a romantic shower for two. If you want to be absolutely antiseptic (which is not necessary, I have never gotten sick from giving a partner a “rim job”) you can take an antiseptic baby wipe and wrap it around a finger and clean the inside of the anus. At any rate have your man lick the anus and then penetrate your anus with his tongue in and out. Have him spread your butt cheeks apart so that he can enter it even deeper with his tongue. Once you get past the idea and let yourself go (and him too) you will find that it is incredibly arousing. Be willing to do it to your guy as it is very pleasurable for us as well. In another article I will explain how to have anal sex and that you can actually climax with anal sex. This article is about foreplay not actual intercourse.

10. Stroking your vagina with his penis. Before your man enters you for intercourse, have him take by now his erect penis and stroke it between your vaginal lips and on your clitty. Have him tease the entrance of your vagina with it. This will cause you to get exceedingly wet and your vagina can actually ache from the desire to be penetrated. Believe me two or three minutes of this kind of stimulation will have you literally begging him to take you and enter you. That will of course be a huge turn on and compliment for him.

AFTERPLAY TECHNIQUES

Now I know that the idea of after play to you seems unlikely.
You feel that you don’t get enough foreplay and usually once a man

Climaxes, then it is usually all over. Tell your man that you still
Have climaxes left in you and you would like him to get you off
some more. Tell him how horny he makes you and that you
want more of him. This is usually enough to persuade him.

11. Getting additional Orgasms Most men do not understand
That once he has you to this level of sexual excitement, it is a lot easier for you to achieve additional orgasms. Here is how you can easily knock off another ten orgasms. Get a Hitachi Magic Wand Vibrator. You have to order it on-line. It is the most intense, most powerful vibrator out there. You turn it on high and place it at your clitty. You have your man rhythmically finger you with his thumb, (a thumb is a lot bigger and close to the size of your man’s erect penis in girth) while also sucking on your nipples at the same time. The combination of the multiple sensory inputs will easily and powerfully give you additionally orgasms. This might so turn your man on that he gets another erection for another go round. Be sure and be very complimentary to him for taking such good care of you and you love how he makes you come with multiple orgasms. Positive reinforcement does wonders to encourage your guy to do it for you on a regular basis.

12. Once you are both satisfied, have him go into the bathroom an
And get a large towel and have him soak it in very hot water. Then have him wring it out very well and have him give you a hot towel massage. Have him pay careful attention to cleaning up between your legs. You will feel wonderfully pampered and be sure to ooh and aah. Then have him get a dry towel and dry you off and then have him powder your whole body down with your favorite powder. Then have him climb back in bed with you for cuddling time and spooning. You should put on a pair of silky panties, (not thongs) for spooning because the feeling of his penis against your butt covered by silky panties feels very erotic to him. The silkiness of the back of your panties reminds him of the wonderful feeling of the silky interior of your wet vagina. Have him lovingly stroke your butt through those panties. You will love the feeling of his hand stroking your butt and he will love the feeling of those silky panties against his penis and against his hand. If you include all of these techniques, I guarantee you happier and more satisfied sex.


Here Are Some Great Survival Tips for Dating After Divorce For Men

February 19, 2012

Dating After Divorce Tips for Men

If you’re a man who has recently found himself sans wedding ring due to the legal termination of a marriage, you might be toying with the idea of dating again. But anyone (even you tough guys) who has been through a divorce knows that putting the goods back out on the market can be difficult and even a little intimidating. So before you do, be sure to check out the following tips to make the leap into the dating pool a successful swim that won’t leave you gasping for air and in need of CPR:

Take the time to get over it. Sure, you might think that the best way to heal an old wound is with a new band aid; but if you start dating new women before your divorce is even finalized, you could be setting yourself up for yet another serious disaster. When you get into a new relationship too soon, there is the threat of infecting your new relationship with issues from your past. So take the time you need to get over your marriage and focus on yourself for a little while in order to be the best you for the next lucky lady who strolls into your life.

Focus on the positives. Anyone who has been through the debilitating agony of a divorce knows that it has a way of completely tearing you down to a point where you feel like you can’t go on another day. Of course you’ve been through hell and there are bound to be times like this; but it is important to try and stay positive—especially when you are dating again. No new woman wants to sit there as you cry and complain about that gold-digging, two-timing ex-wife of yours who left you in financial and emotional ruins. Instead, talk about the parts of life that you enjoy, keep things light and do your best to let your positivity shine through—there is nothing more attractive to a woman than that.

Don’t compare. The whole point of dating is to explore what all is out there, right? So if you’re dating someone new and all you can think about is how she stacks up to the likes of your ex-wife, don’t expect for the new relationship to pan out successfully. The “ex” prefaces the word “wife” for a reason. Instead of judging the new lady in your life and writing her off just because she doesn’t cook your grilled cheese sandwiches just the way the former Mrs. did, embrace the opportunity you have to get to know someone new and accept them who they are—you never know, she just might be able to heat things up in the kitchen better than your ex used to!

Learn from your mistakes. When you reflect back on your marriage, there are sure to be some things that you wish you could change. And while you shouldn’t harp on the mistakes you made and focus only on what might have been with your ex-wife, you should however think about what you can do to make sure that you don’t fall into the same bad habits in your new relationship. Rather than living in the past, try to look at it as a learning experience to grow from and move on to a brighter, happier future.

One of the key things is learning to have peaceful conflict resolution without hurting your girlfriend or new wife. Here is a link to a great article to help you to do that. Peaceful conflict resolution is mandatory if you expect your new relationship to work.

http://www.spirituallyraw.com/profiles/blogs/the-holy-grail-how-to-stop-fighting-with-your-spouse-or-relatives

Another thing is that too many of you guys are still stuck in that old adolescent sexuality of wham bam thank you maam. You need to do it much better. Here is a link to make you into a hero in the bedroom. Believe me, women talk about your sexual performance. If you follow these sex tips, you will be better than 95% of the guys out there and the best that your woman has ever had and she will be much more accomodating of your sexual needs. Thank me later.
https://marriagecoach1.wordpress.com/2011/04/22/forreplay-and-afterplay-how-to-be-a-hero-in-the-bedroom/

And finally, most likely you will be dating women with kids and you need to learn how to deal with step kids. You must understand that they will not welcome you into the family. These kids are still grieving the loss of their parents as a family. They will do anything in their power to break you up and often succeed.

You need to have a meeting of the minds with your new woman and provide a united front to the kids both hers and yours.
One of the most common techniques in their little demon arsenal is saying: “you can’t tell me what to do, you are not my dad” or mom. The answer is simple. You say and get your woman to say as well, no I am not your dad, but I am a parent in this house and you have to do what I say because I am an adult charged with your care while you are over hear as well as your mom.

It would be a great idea to have a meeting with the kids and explain to them that you and your woman will not put up with these kinds of battles but they can have their say as long as it is respectful and then go over the rules of peaceful conflict resolution with them as well. If they break the rules there must be consequences to that. Have a family meeting with you and the woman and the kids and decide among yourselves what those consequences are. This will go a long way to insuring more domestic tranquility and preserving the relationship. Why don’t you email us with your tips on how to do it better.

Sabrina Jackson is a guest post author who shares her advice to men for dating post-divorce. In addition, Sabrina also contributes articles to Best Dating Sites where she provides information about safe dating on the web.
http://www.100bestdatingsites.org


The Story of How I Got To Be in The Helping Professions

February 18, 2012

The Story Of How I Got To Be Me In The Helping Professions
May 18, 2011

I grew up in an extremely dysfunctional home. I had a cold, distant and alcoholic mother. I had an unbelievably cruel father who enjoyed inflicting pain on my two brother s and me. Some examples: He hit me full force with a punch to my nose, shattering it for the sin of interrupting him when he was talking. He told me to take a bath and go to bed, leaving my broken nose untreated. 3 years later I experienced something that has profoundly changed me for life. My 6 year old brother rebelled in a way that came to haunt us. He went over to his school in the summer with another boy and threw paint all over the school. The police were called and they were caught and brought him home. My father said that he would take care of it. He took him back into the bedroom where he shared with his 3 year old brother, next to my room where I was. He proceeded to beat him with a belt and would not stop. I was convinced that he was going to kill him.

I desperately wanted to stop him. At 12 I was trying to figure out how to stop my father from killing my little brother. I considered that I was not big enough or strong enough to stop him. I thought about my baseball bat. I was plagued with doubts as I tried desperately to figure a way to stop my father while hearing the blood curdling screams of my little brother being savagely beaten. I thought that I could go in and threaten him and he would stop. Then I realized that he would take the bat away from me and use it on me. Then I thought that I could go in and hit him in the head and knock him out. Then I realized he would wake up and beat me with the bat so enraged that he likely would kill me. Then I thought of hitting him in the head so hard that I killed him. The thought of going to jail for life stopped me. In the end I sat in my room in tears and desperately hating myself because I was not big enough or strong enough to stop him. He continued beating my little brother until he exhausted himself. He had to go and sit down in his recliner to rest. After resting for a half hour he went in again and beat on him yet again. I don’t know how my brother survived it and my little brother was terrified at age 3. There were many other beatings in the household.

As I got a little older, I was always picked on by bullies and always cowered because of my father. That incident so filled me with rage that two years later, I got into a fight with a kid who squirted chocolate milk on my white shirt at school. I beat the crap out of him and then had to beat the crap out of another guy right afterwards. Then two days later had to beat the crap out of someone again. It was an awakening for me. No more did I have to tolerate bullies. I told the old man that the beatings were going to stop at home or I would beat him to death and meant it, unafraid. Never again would I fear another man.

I wondered at man’s inhumanity to man. Like all kids who were abused as kids, you grow up bent in one of two different directions; you either grow up to be a bully or you grow up to join the ranks of the helping professions. I decided to get into the helping professions because there was no one there to protect my brothers and myself when we needed it.

I see marriages breaking up, parents fighting in front of kids and terrifying them. Using kids in the parents battle against each other. I want it to stop and I am willing to do whatever I can to stop it and help couples get along and grow and nurture each other. That is my goal as well as my dream. Please help me to spread the word.

I offer a money back guarantee and a half hour free consultation. Email me and I will call you and set up a phone appt to help. I can help with kids, your sex life or your relationship. You have absolute anonymity with me. I want to help and I am good at it.


The Single Biggest Mistake That Women Make In Their Men Relationships

February 10, 2012

Okay ladies, I am going to give you an inside look at the male psyche.

MEN NEED RESPECT EVEN MORE THAN THEY NEED SEX!

Lack of respect shows up in many ways. The number one complaint that I get about women from men in my
practice is that they don’t make it safe for men to tell them the truth. If a man makes a comment that can in any way be construed by the woman as negative about her, invariably she goes on the attack; yelling, screaming, name calling and/or crying. The goal of course is to teach that “no good man” to never ever critique her again. Men learn the lesson all too well and learn to seethe in silence. All you have done is to effectively KILL THE INTIMACY between the two of you.

You must learn to be willing to listen to anything that he says and give him SAFE HARBOR to say anything to you. If you don’t all you do is cause him to lie to you or just shut down his emotions. You women don’t have any problem at all telling your guy what is wrong with him and what you would like for him to do to change it. IT IS NOT FAIR and builds real resentment towards you. You are KILLING YOUR OWN RELATIONSHIP by this practice.

Another thing that is common to women disrespecting their husbands is belittling his sexuality with negative comments like: What are you some kind of pervert, is that all you ever think about? A man is at his most emotionally vulnerable place when he approaches you for sex. Inside every grown man is a little boy whose feelings are CRUSHED when you say hateful hurtful things to him. We are taught not to show our emotions but we definitely FEEL THEM and resent you for making us keep them inside. In fact studies have shown that the average married woman with kids at home keep their husbands on a starvation diet of sex once a week or less when the average guy needs it 3 times a week. You need to take better care of your man.

Men want to be appreciated for the things that they do to try and take care of you. If you want more of that, say thank you and tell him that you really appreciate what he does for you and MEAN IT!

Tell him how good looking he is to you and mean it. Tell him how good he is with the kids. Don’t be anal about what he does to help around the house. I once worked with a famous book author who refolded the towels after her husband had folded them and put them away. He said that the did not mind helping but she did not get to dictate how it got done. Relax, it is not worth battling over. You need to learn to choose your battles. There is really not that much worth fighting about and hurting your husbands feelings over.

The relationship that you save could be your own.

Blessings on you and yours
John Wilder


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