Masturbation is Not A Sin According To The Bible. Here Is The Proof

March 28, 2012

Masturbation is Not a Sin According to The Bible
Scriptural Exegesis by John Wilder

It is indeed surprising how many main-stream pastors who would eschew “proof texting” have no problem doing exactly that when it comes to masturbation. Sadly the discussion of sex in churches in our country are limited to it is “bad, dirty and wrong and that good girls don’t do it”. They completely miss out on all the sex positive messages from the bible and that sex is a gift from God.

The churches completely ignore a NT mandated ministry in Titus 2 where it says: “that the older women of the church are supposed to teach the younger women of the church how to love their husbands (sexually) so that the Word of God is not blasphemed” As a result there is a lot of lousy sex going on out there because so many women have real ambivalence over their sexuality. Sex is of course on of the big 3 that couples fight about and divorce over.

We live in a very puritanical society, not unlike the middle east who are also puritanical about sex. As a result, we have the highest divorce rate on the planet.

Let us not therefore judge one another any more; but judge this rather, that no man put a stumbling block or occasion to fall in his brother’s way. Romans 14:13

We tell our kids not to masturbate that it is a sin. God made the sex drive one of the most powerful known to man. You lay a huge load of guilt on kids over this.

For the record, there is no place in the bible stating that masturbation is a sin or even referring to it. The Catholic church talks about the sin of Onan in Genesis 38 where he spilled his seed on the ground. This however had nothing at all to do with masturbation but Onan was having sex with his deceased brother’s wife according to Jewish law to raise up an heir to his deceased brother. God performed the death penalty on Onan for his sin of disobedience.

The bible is very explicit and detailed in what God defines as sexual sin; Tokens of virginity were required of the bride (bloody sheets) in Deut 22:15-17.

Daughters were not supposed to be a whore and fathers were not to pimp out their daughters as whores in Leviticus 19:29 and 21:7,9

Priests of the temple could not have any blemish or physical abnormality including having damaged testicles (and they wanted to inspect them) in Leviticus 21:20

Priests were required to marry only a virgin of his tribe according to Leviticus 21:13

Speaking of testicles, if a wife observing her husband in a fight with another man and the other man was beating up her husband, if she grabbed the man’s testicles to be an equalizer to help her husband in the fight, her hand was to be amputated. Deut 25:11-12

Not only was incest forbidden but God gave us every possible family combination considered incest in Leviticus 18:6-18

You were not supposed to have sex with your wife on her period (OT only, Hebrews 13:4 dispenses with the ceremonial laws) in Leviticus 18:19

You were not to commit adultery with your neighbor’s wife in Leviticus 18:20

You were not supposed to have homosexual sex according to Leviticus 18:22

Men and women were forbidden to have sex with animals I n Leviticus 18:23

You were not supposed to have orgy sex to false gods in Leviticus 20:5

If you persuade a virgin to have sex with you then you are required to marry her according to Deut 22:28-29

Cross dressing was forbidden in Deut 22:5 for both men and women.

We are told to flee fornication in the NT in the following chapters: Gal 5:19, Eph 5:3, and Col 3:5. But so many people mis-translate fornication as having sex as singles.. What fornication actually means is not to earn your living as a temple prostitute in the false god worship which consisted of mass orgies in the groves to false gods. Because people were poor, the would be paid prostitutes to help people who did not have a willing partner to have sex with. There was a split in pay between the prostitute and the temple. Fornication in the greek is where we get our word for pornography. The literal greek is porneo and pornea which is a male and female prostitute.

Have you noticed that there is no mention of masturbation here? God created sex as a gift for us and for our pleasure. It is such a strong drive in us that God allowed young teens to get married to have a legal outlet for their sexuality. This is demonstrated in Proverbs 5 where it says:

Let thy fountain be blessed and rejoice always with the wife of your youth (young teens). Let her be as a loving hind and a pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy you at all times and be thou always RAVISHED in her love. Prov 5:18-19

Ravished is a biblical word for having great sex

Because sex is such a strong drive in man, God allowed multiple wives and concubines for men to have legal sex with when the primary wife turned them down for sex.

This of course changed with the Proverbs 31 woman where the wife was tasked with now taking care of all the husband’s sexual needs instead of having multiple wives and concubines where it says that he will have no need of spoil. Spoil is an arcane term where the conquering armies got to take the stuff from dead soldiers houses including the pretty young widows. It says that the husband will praise her and the scholars in The Thompson’s Chain Reference Bible rightly translate this into his appreciation for her sexual submission and conjugal love as a footnote in the margin.

In I Cor 7:3-5 we are told that the husband does not have the right to refuse his wife sex nor does the wife have the right to refuse her husband sex. Pretty sex positive don’t you think?

So considering all of these scriptures you must realize that to define masturbation as a sin, you must posit that God made a mistake that we have to correct because God forgot to mention masturbation as the sin that we all KNOW THAT IT IS.

Well according to the bible we are not supposed to add to the word or take away from it.

You shall not add to the word which I command you, nor take from it, that You may keep the commandments of the Lord your God which I command you. Deut 4:2

Whatever I command you, you shall be careful to observe it: You shall not add to it or take away from it. Deut 12:32

Every word of God is pure: He is a shield to those who put their trust in Him. Do not add to His words, lest He rebuke you and you be found a liar. Proverbs 30:6

I know that whatever God does, it shall be forever. Nothing can be addedTo it and nothing can be taken from it. God does it that men should fear Him. That which is already been and what is to be has already been: And God requires an account of what is past. Eccl 3:14-15

For I testify to everyone who hears the words of the prophecy of this book: If anyone adds to these things, God will add unto him the plagues that are written in this book; and if anyone takes away from the words of this book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part from the Book of Life from the Holy City and from the things which are written in this book. Rev 22:18

We as Christians are supposed to only teach biblical truths and not make up our rules and man- made doctrines like Catholics do. We are believers in the book but sadly we are seeing legalism creep into our churches to our people’s detriment. This is specifically forbidden by Jesus in the following scripture:

And in vain do they worship Me, teaching for doctrines the commandments Of men. For laying aside the commandment of God, you hold the tradition of men, the washing of pitchers and cups, and many other such things you do. He said to them, All to well you reject the commandment of God, that you may keep your tradition Mark 7:7-9

We also had a problem with Asceticism cropping up in the NT which is also forbidden in the following scripture:

Therefore, if you died with Christ from the basic principles of the world, why, as though living the world do you subject yourselves to regulation Do not touch, do not taste, do not handle, which all concern things which perish with the using-according to the commandments and doctrines of men. These things indeed have the appearance of wisdom in self-imposed Religion, false humility, and neglect of the body, but are no value against the indulgence of the flesh. Col 2:20-23

The proof texted verse is the only one that people who argue for masturbation is a sin is found in Math 5:28

But I say unto you whoever looks on a woman to lust after her has already committed adultery with her already in his heart.

This is an impossible standard that Jesus set for us but a goal to strive to reach in our our lives. The idea was to avoid sexual sin. The answer is to masturbate to relieve the sexual tension that would cause us to lust after a woman. I can remember that in my twenties I decided to see just how long I could go without sexual relief in masturbation. I lasted for two weeks. During this time I had constant erections and lusted constantly after women. Normally I masturbated every day to contain my lustful thoughts and embarrassing erections.

Paul talked about keeping his body under subjection and we can infer that he was referring to masturbation to do so because of the previously stated sexual arousal when you don’t have sexual relief.

Finally here is the slam dunk verse that proves that masturbation is not a sin:

And if a man’s seed of copulation go out from him, then he shall wash all his flesh in water, and be unclean until the evening. And every garment, and every skin, whereon is the seed of copulation shall be washed with water, and be unclean until the evening. The woman also with whom man shall lie with seed of copulation, they shall both wash themselves in water, and be unclean until the evening. Leviticus 15:16-18

Now the bible does not say how the man’s sperm is discharged whether a nocturnal emission or masturbation, it simply says that if his seed is discharged then he needs to take a bath. Masturbation feels good and gives us sexual relief when we are not married. Even little girls routinely masturbate if left to their own devices unless a scolding parent tells them that it is bad, dirty and wrong. We have no business laying this legalism on our kids or ourselves..

Giving Your Man a Great Blow Job and Getting Over The Yuck Factor

March 21, 2012

Giving Your Man A Great Blow Job and Overcoming Your Inhibitions About It

I am re-posting this article. Every day, it gets read by at least 4 or 5 people. In fact it is my number one read article. I write for women to get over their inhibitions over giving their men oral sex. A man feels cheated and rejected and unloved when a woman refuses him this sublime pleasure. A woman who refuses this pleasure is not giving herself completely to her man. I suggest getting over your inhibitions about this and become adept at pleasuring your man.

This is an age old discussion. There are many women who refuse to give their husbands blow jobs. “Ugh, gross, I am not going to do that”. “Little girl” inhibitions are cropping up again here. Do you want to have a Bill and Hillary marriage where your husband has to go to other women or hookers to get a blow job? That is the number one thing men visit hookers for. A great percentage of men who frequent prostitutes are married. By your refusal, you are then a stumbling block for him as forbidden in the chapter on sex and the bible. Some of you will give your men blow jobs but won’t allow him to come in your mouth. Some of you will give him a blow job but then will spit out his semen. You claim that you don’t like the taste. Imagine if your husband went down on you but then spit out the vaginal secretions that he got in his mouth. How likely would you want him to go down on you again? What if he would not go down on you because he claimed not to like your taste? Really, when you tell your husband that, you are telling him that you think that he is disgusting and more of that age old sexism where women are good and men are bad.

If you really want to be cherished by your husband, and you want to show him your love, you need to learn to give him good blow jobs. Any woman can lay there with her legs spread and think about other things while her poor husband pumps away at her. It takes love and commitment to take his penis (dick) in your mouth and make love to him. It is intensely personal and loving. Without it, he feels profoundly cheated and disappointed.

For those of you who have a problem with getting semen in your mouth, you can take an intermediate step. You can put a condom on your husband’s dick (penis) and give him the blow job and you are not going to get any semen in your mouth. You can use it as a “baby step” to make progress. You can feel him ejaculate but not actually get the semen in your mouth. You should use this technique as a way to progress to a full blow job where you allow your husband to come in your mouth and swallow. At the very least, you should use this technique to give him a blow job. I know of women out there who won’t even take their husband’s dick in their mouth. I ask you if you are one of those women, why did you even bother to get married anyway? You need to get over this. You can if you have the right attitude. You can through a desensitization process called “successive approximations.” This basically means getting a little closer each time. Others would call it “baby steps”. The point being is that you are getting closer and making progress in moving forward in pleasing and loving your husband.

Now I know that many of you out there will complain about taste or consistency. Neither of those issues needs to be a problem if you have the right attitude and practice the right technique. It is really a simple matter to solve. When your husband’s climax is imminent, instead of trying to block his ejaculation with your tongue, you simply let him shoot to the back of your throat. You then quickly swallow. This solves both problems. You won’t taste his semen because all of your taste buds are on the front of your tongue. Following my technique you therefore don’t taste his semen. You also don’t have the consistency issue to deal with because again it is not hitting your tongue. Allowing him to shoot in the back of your throat, it simply feels like a little extra saliva in your mouth. If you spit out his semen, you get it on your tongue and have the taste and consistency to deal with. You can do this if you decide to.

For all you feminists out there who claim to espouse equal rights, how is it fair for you to expect your man to go down on you and you don’t return the favor? Where is his equal rights? Besides that, your vaginal secretions taste remarkably similar to his semen. Hillary is a feminist who obviously does not give Bill blowjobs and look what that got her. Do you really think that they have a happy marriage? Do you think that they are achieving “happily ever after”?

If you have not given your husband a blow job but have now decided to, it is not difficult. He will love you for attempting to please him. You simply go down on him and suck. If his penis is limp, you can generally take his whole dick (penis) in your mouth. You suck on it like you are sucking a milk shake through a straw. You also place your tongue firmly against his dick (penis). As his dick grows to a full erection, you go down as deeply on it as you comfortably can without gagging. You then wrap your hand around his dick (penis) at that point as a marker and don’t go deeper than that when you start vigorously thrusting up and down on the shaft of his dick. If your jaw gets tired or you need to remove your mouth to catch your breath, it is imperative that you continue stroking his dick with your hand or he will lose the momentum of getting to the point of ejaculating. If you stop, then you will have to start all over again.

There are other very obvious reasons to give your husbands blow jobs. Most of you won’t consider having intercourse when you are on your period. Why should your husband be deprived of sex just because you are on your period? If you really love him and care about his needs, you won’t deprive him of sexual relief. After childbirth, you are forbidden from intercourse for 6 weeks on average. Again, why should your husband be forced to masturbate? Many women feel that they have the right to deprive him after childbirth. In fact many of you deprive your husband sex for months after giving birth claiming that you are too tired. He feels rejected, lonely and resentful towards you and the new baby.

Let me give you a technique that requires little energy expenditure from you and yet gets your husband off fairly quickly and keeps him happy and satisfied. This would involve two props: a pair of your lacy and silky panties and our Power Tool Vibrator. (go to our website to order this fantastic product) You give him a little foreplay by stroking your nipples across his penis (dick). You then start sucking his dick and take those silky panties, (the satiny back panel of the panties) and lightly stroke them across the underside of his scrotum (balls, nut-sack) This area is extremely sensitive to him. You continue to rapidly stroke very lightly with those panties on the underside of his scrotum while you are sucking on him. The silkiness of your panties causes him to think in terms of how silky the interior of your vagina (pussy) feels when it is well lubricated. You then turn the Power Tool Vibrator on high and place the bulb firmly on the base of his penis (dick). You simply hold the bulb of the vibrator firmly against the base of his dick while you are sucking him. It is a very powerful stimulant to him and will cause him to get off much quicker, thereby conserving energy on your part. It will also give him a mind blowing orgasm because of the combination of the sensation of you sucking him, stroking him with your panties and the powerful vibrator. Don’t be surprised if he screams in ecstasy in the most intense orgasm he has ever had.

Now for you women who absolutely refuse to give your husband a blowjob or who won’t let him come in your mouth, there is a variation of the above scenario. You simply not only stroke those silky panties under his testicles, but you wrap the silky side of the panties around his cock and stroke them up and down his dick. You then place the Power Tool Vibrator at the base of his dick and let him ejaculate into your panties. He will fantasize about coming inside of you. It will take care of his urgent need for sexual relief and is so much better than making him masturbate. You should never ever make your husband masturbate to relieve himself. He will have a lot of resentment towards you because you are not taking care of his sexual needs. The above technique is not the best, but you should promise him that you will never ever deny him sex again, even if you have to give it to him less than what he desires.

A New Milestone

March 17, 2012

I just went over 80,000 page views. Yea Me. With WordPress new stats page I can now follow how
many countries are tuned into my blog. Would you believe that I have readers in over 101 countries.

I started this blog to help people with their personal lives, their marriages and most importantly their sex lives.
My comments have been overwhelmingly positive on here and I thank all the readers and commenters for your input.
One wonders if there is anybody out there actually reading your advice.

My number one detractors have been women for whom I have held accountable in their role with their men.
This is not surprising as the number one complaint that I get in my practice of marriage, relationship and
sexual coaching is that women don’t make it safe for men to tell them the truth if it has anything at all
to do with critiquing the woman. Women invariably will go all defensive, yell, scream, call him names
and/or cry with the goal of teaching that no good man to never do it again. What they do is kill their
own relationships. They ALWAYS reserve the right to critique husband but does not believe in the husbands
EQUAL RIGHTS to critique her.

If you force someone to shut up and keep their feelings to themselves like that you are in the process
of killing your own marriage or relationship. They will withdraw away from you and eventually the relationship
will fail.

Women you need to be able to listen to your man’s complaints about you and instead of going all postal on him you
need to ask him: “in what ways can I resolve this or make this better for you?” and then listen and follow his ideas
as much as possible. The relationship that you save can be your own. This is doubly important if you have
kids at home. Kids in a single parent family have the odds staggeringly negative against them. Most of the
problems in our country can be directly or indirectly traced to single parent families.

I am open to critique on this milestone. I am also open to guest posts on here. So feel free to drop me a note
in the comments section or drop me a line at Also if you are having marriage, relationship
or sexual problems I will be only too happy to help you. I give an unheard of in the industry money back

blessings on you and yours
John Wilder

Here Are 10 Compliments To Give To Your Woman

March 16, 2012

10 Great Sexy Things About Women
Ten Sexy Things About Women
1. Her mouth. Wonderful thing that mouth that is so good at kissing you and making you all happy And horny. How wonderful it feels when she takes us into that mouth.
2. Her hair. I love to play with a woman’s hair. I love to get my face in it and I love it when she strokes across my naked body. I love how it smells.
3. Her breasts. Well you guys can extol at length over a woman’s breasts. We never tire of looking at them, sucking on them, feeling them against our backs, against the back of our arm when she is standing close, feeling them in our hands or again stroking them against our member.
4. Her butt. Do you ever tire of squeezing her butt cheeks in your hands, or looking at it in jeans or better yet in a short skirt or feel it against you doing it doggy style?
5. Her legs, yes especially when she is wearing high heels. Those calves make us want to melt, especially well shaved legs that are so silky to the touch.
6. Her heart which can forgive us for so much, and when it melts when we do something romantic for her.
7. Her vagina. Okay guys you know it is the promised land and heaven this side of earth when it is given to us freely and lovingly.
8. Her lingerie, the frillier and lacier the better. Most men would rather see their woman in frilly lacy lingerie than see her naked, especially when she flashes you when she gets into a car that we have opened for her in a short skirt.
9. Her whole body when it comes to hugging, sleeping next to us or cuddled up. Can anything feel so right, I don’t think so.
10. The way that she completes us. Admit it guys, you are never truly happy when you are totally single. We just are meant to have a woman of our own, God made it that way.

Tell that woman that you love her today and that you appreciate her and that you are glad to have her in your life. It will fill up her love bank.

Blessings on you and yours

March 16, 2012

Marriagecoach1's Blog

Ten Sexy Things About Women
1. Her mouth. Wonderful thing that mouth that is so good at kissing you and making you all happy And horny. How wonderful it feels when she takes us into that mouth.
2. Her hair. I love to play with a woman’s hair. I love to get my face in it and I love it when she strokes across my naked body. I love how it smells.
3. Her breasts. Well you guys can extol at length over a woman’s breasts. We never tire of looking at them, sucking on them, feeling them against our backs, against the back of our arm when she is standing close, feeling them in our hands or again stroking them against our member.
4. Her butt. Do you ever tire of squeezing her butt cheeks in your hands, or looking at it in jeans or better yet in a…

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