I am so sorry, my blog has been hijacked and I have been unable to post on here for over a month.
I have questions about my domain renewal. In addition I have questions about the huge drop in my
page views. I upgraded to your later form and my page views went from 700-1,000 page views
down to about 100 -180 page views.
Can you call me at
This is a hoot blog post
Hellooooo ladies and gents! Robert from moolta checking in again to show you some other crazy things I ran into on my trip. While this one won’t be a story like the “Amster-dam good dares” post, I promise you it’s just as crazy. Today my friends, you will get the inside scoop on the Prague Sex Machine Museum… prepare yourself.
View original post 244 more words
I have a new book coming out later in January. You can get a free copy by going on over to my new blog site at marriagecoach1.com and signing up for free to my new blog and leaving me a comment that you would like a copy. All I ask is that you review it on Amazon if it is a good review and send it to me if it is a bad review.
The title of the book is SEX EDUCATION FOR ADULTS, SECRETS TO AMAZING SEX AND HAPPILY EVER AFTER TOO. This book will teach you how to have a better sex life and how to stop fighting with your spouse and instead have peaceful and respectful conflict resolution where it is a win win for both of you.
Pleasuring your man,
Here Is The First And Most Important Chapter in My Book, It Is About How To Have Peaceful Coflict Resolution and Stop Fighting With Your SpouseJuly 3, 2012
This is the first and most important chapter in my soon to be published book (JANUARY 2013 ON AMAZON) entitled SEX EDUCATION FOR ADULTS, SECRETS TO AMAZING SEX AND HAPPILY EVER AFTER TOO. I need your help to make it a best seller. I want to prove that a book written from a Christian perspective can be a best seller in the secular world. I welcome all ideas on how to promote it and ask that you join my blog and ask other contacts to as well so that I can notify you when the book is published. It will only be $9.95 and I guarantee you more and better sex, better relationships with your spouse or your money back. When have you ever seen an author offer a money back guarantee? Would you like us on Twitter and retweet this post on Twitter please? Thanks for your help in advance.
RESOLVING CONFLICT PEACEFULLY
Fighting comes naturally, peacefully resolving conflict does not. I am sure that you can remember all too well fights that you have had in your own relationship. The problem with fighting is that no one wants to “lose” the fight so we lock into combat that almost always escalates into dysfunction. That dysfunction can be screaming, throwing things, cursing and/or hitting a spouse.
I had a couple as a client locked into dysfunction. The woman had gotten into a pattern of screaming, cursing and throwing things. The husband admirably did not hit her, but tried to keep the peace because of what the wife’s tirades and tantrums did to the children. She once broke her own finger by repeatedly slamming the front door harder and harder. Problems were never resolved; she just bullied the husband to get her own way. I could not reach her and they ultimately got a divorce. She continued these patterns in a subsequent marriage.
I always tell my clients to first go and study two movies from the rental store: THE BREAK UP, and WAR OF THE ROSES. You can see art imitating life. Study these movies and see yourselves portrayed in these movies. Watch and see the mistakes that they have made and that you have made similar mistakes as well. Children are terrified when they hear parents fighting. Remember the scene from PRINCE OF TIDES when the young children ran and jumped into the bay. They lived in an idyllic setting on an island. They escaped by running out of the house and jumping into the water. Most children don’t have that option and simply suffer through the fights, terrified. If you have not seen The Prince of Tides, it is also mandatory on my homework list.
To avoid those problems and dysfunction, I have listed some techniques that are guaranteed to work if you will use them. I tell my clients that they both need to agree to change their ways. They also need to forgive each other and enact the old familiar slogan from the playground: A DO OVER. Admit that you have both made mistakes and that as a couple you want a do over and agree to rules that I have listed for peacefully resolving the conflict. A great idea is to adopt the physician’s vow about dealing with your conflicts; “ First, do no harm.”
When a spouse is angry with you, the first rule is to SHUT UP AND LISTEN. I know that it is hard to do. You need to let them get out everything that bothers them before you counter their arguments. Once they are done, ask to repeat back what they said so that you and the spouse are sure that you understand the problem. Then ask: “In what way can we resolve this problem”? This goes a long way to resolving the problem. Calmly discuss solutions. “A soft answer turns away wrath, but grievous words stir up anger” Proverbs 15:1
AGREE TO DISAGREE
Too many times people are locked into winning. The problem with winning is that there is also a loser who will feel humiliated.
Better to “agree to disagree”. In this way, neither party feels like they have “lost” the argument.
FLIPPING A COIN
If negotiating has not worked and the person is still adamant that they want a solution the Bible has a solution: “The lot causes contentions to cease and parts the mighty.” Proverbs
Casting lots was a dice game, but a modern day corollary would be a flip of the coin to settle the issue. You both have to agree in advance that this will settle the issue, and then stick to it.
When you are in a discussion where you both have a point of view that you feel strongly about, there is another alternative. You can agree to negotiate the argument for a peaceful settlement. You can do this by adopting a 10 scale. You each assign a numerical value form 1-10 depending on how firmly you believe your side is worth. You have to give an honest evaluation. Using a 10 where there is absolutely no room for negotiation, to a 1 scale where you could go either way. Come up with a legitimate number to assess your position. Suppose your
spouse is at a 7 and you are at a 4 then you agree to give in to the spouse’s 7 to make for a peaceful resolution.
SPLITTING THE DIFFERENCE
Another good way to resolve the argument is to simply compromise half way between the two points of view. Both parties feel like they got something and don’t feel humiliated.
The Ten Commandments for Fair Fighting
1. Never argue in front of the children, it harms and scares them.
2. Don’t ever hit your spouse.
3. Don’t curse at or call your spouse names, it is abusive.
4. Don’t attempt to get your way by bullying your spouse.
5. Don’t withhold sex to get your way.
6. Do not scream at your spouse it is abusive.
7. Do not interrupt; it is disrespectful, listen until they are done.
8. Do not take revenge for perceived hurts.
9. Develop a peacemaking attitude with questions like: How can we resolve this?
10. Don’t give people the “silent treatment”. It is revenge and it is emotionally abusive.
I have re-written an old nursery rhyme that is more appropriate: Sticks and stones can only break your bones but words can wound a spirit, break a heart or kill a relationship.
Remember, your job as a spouse is to nurture your spouse. You can’t do that when you are being self centered. According to Dr. Laura Schlesinger, self centeredness is a leading cause of divorce. You also don’t nurture your spouse when you attempt to bully them in an argument instead of peacefully resolving the conflict while respecting them and their feelings.
Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man (woman) be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: for the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God. James 1:19
The big problem is that the vast majority of people don’t heed the above scriptural mandate. Most people are doing just the opposite: they are quick to anger, quick to speak and slow to listen. If you can follow the scriptural mandate, you will be amazed at how much better your marriage works.
You need to adopt the oriental philosophy of “saving face”. This is a philosophy of mutual respect. It is considered in very poor form to in any way deliberately disrespect another person. Their rules are very rigid in that you never ever would consider doing anything that would cause someone to feel humiliated or embarrassed. Our western culture clearly does not teach respect for other people’s feelings.
Finally, if you can’t resolve an argument, then seek out the services of a marriage coach. Avoid marriage counselors at all costs. The dirty little secret in the industry is that marriage counselors have a 75% failure rate according to some leading counselors turned Marriage Coaches like Dr. Willard Harley, author of HIS NEEDS, HER NEEDS and Michelle Weiner Davis, author of DIVORCE BUSTING. Marriage counselors have you come back for weeks and talk about feelings. Coaches concentrate on resolving problems in a short period of time. If
you need help, put into your search engine and look for marriage coaches, or just email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
An Open Letter to United States Educators, Teachers and Students: What is The True Purpose of Education?
“The goal of education is not the unquestioning acceptance of any single interpretation, but the development of an individual’s critical abilities.”
The above quote is from the inside front cover of the Cliffs Notes on T. S. Eliot’s Major Poems & Plays – Cliffs Notes Incorporated, Lincoln Nebraska, 1992 Printing.
I quite agree with this view of the goal (purpose) of education. This was the prevailing view among responsible US educators until the late1960s.
Or is the correct purpose of education the indoctrination of students’ minds with/in aggressive feminism, identity politics, political correctness, multiculturalism, so-called gender studies, and Marxist economic and social theories?
To educators, I say it is high time for some objective introspection and honesty with yourselves. (And, honesty begins in one’s own mind.) Have you, in zealous pursuit of your agenda(s), done justiceto the formation of these young people’s minds, and the development of their critical abilities? (I think not.)
To college and high school students, dear young people, I say you donot have to buy into, nor believe, the unspoken message (claptrap) that “liberals know best“. Be aware, that liberals are some of the most narrow minded – really close minded – people on the planet. They have very serious problems coming to terms with any real world evidence that contradicts their fervently – even passionately – held views.
Think about it!
Responsible replies are welcome.
THE LOST BOYS? HAS THE MEDIA-CREATED IMAGE OF MEN WHO NEVER GROW UP SPAWNED A NEW GENERATION OF MALES EAGER TO PROVE THEIR WORTH?June 23, 2012
I was heavily quoted in this piece about women’s sexism. Here is the note I received stating that the magazine article was now posted. He also referred to my new book to be published in January
Thank you again for your willingness to talk about the media perception of men. We have developed that story and do have it online. You will receive an email from Burgundy but I wanted to personally send you the link. Thank you again for your wonderful input (http://www.burgundymag.com/index.php/health/wellness/415-media-perception). It was greatly appreciated.
J. Kevin Powell
PIIP Media, LLC
1532 Bubbling Creek Rd.
Atlanta, GA 30319
PIIP Media is a company focused on changing how we view society through uplifting entertainment that is commercially viable. We believe in developing a strong empowering presence in our community by creating an energy through our products that recasts the world in a brighter light. Our media, and associated products, rejuvenate the souls of those who use them.
Published on Friday, 22 June 2012 14:02
Written by J. Kevin Powell
Just a few years ago, a minivan commercial showed a father, so eager to shut out the sounds of his children, he couldn’t wait to get them in the car to turn on the DVD players. Dr. Richard Horowitz was so enraged he wrote the automaker who soon removed the commercial.
Jason Hundley, an X-ray Tech in Radcliffe, Kentucky, continually avoids the pack of women at work who constantly refer to men as children, dogs and ‘just like the men on tv’. Incensed even more by the “we know you’re not like that” comments, he’s searched for ways to fight for male rights.
Affected by the omnipresent definition of happily every after being limited to the woman’s determination of the meaning, John Wilder, a marriage coach, has seen the build up of anger in men over the years. He attributes the demeaning media perception of men to misandry and reeducates couples on roles in their relationships.
Dr. David Power, who abhors the Tim the Tool Man stereotype portrayed through various television shows and commercials, routinely does the laundry and cooks for himself. With a baby in the house, his two sons know when he calls a code brown, to get diapers, wipes and help daddy change the baby’s diaper. He’s started a fight club.
While the media continues to portray men as grown kids who need to be coddled and directed by the strong hand of their mother-like spouses, men throughout America are fighting back. Men are growing weary of this characterization, even in a limited tongue and cheek manner.
“Men who are more mature and have families, those men are somewhat confused about the world,” said Dr. Horowitz, who now runs GrowingGreatRelationships.com with his wife.
The appreciation for the everyday male has seemed to wane in recent history. It seems as if a male simply takes care of his home, he’s still doing something wrong. If he does dress well, then he still may not be metrosexual enough. If he is a good guy, he doesn’t possess enough raw aggression to spark the chemistry of a bad boy. And if he is a bad boy, well, of course he’s a project that can be fixed.
But a large amount of confusion seems to be attributed to the power of the feminist movement and the confusion that era has brought to men in America.
Women’s rights began in 1913 but didn’t end in 1920 when women received the right to vote. In her book,Stiffed, Susan Faludi attributes much of the change of women’s gender roles to WWII when many women were needed to work in support of the war effort and take care of both gender roles at home.
This period sparked an undercurrent of misandry as men returned home and attempted to reinsert themselves into their traditional gender roles, roles women now knew they could perform.
However, John Wilder, author of the soon to be published Sex Education for Adults, Secrets to Amazing Sex and Happily Ever After Too, states rearing of women during this period did not significantly change. Many women were not, and still are not, raised in a critique-friendly environment similar to young men.
As women learned to openly analyze men’s actions, there was no education on how receiving it. Even worst, men learned never to say anything.
“The number one complaint I get from men is women do not make it safe to critique women,” said John. “Women say they want equality, but they want absolute dominance. Most [men] had coaches and grew up accepting critique where women take it personally.”
John states that while women sought equality socially, they didn’t accept it within their interpersonal relationships.
Dr. Powers knows too well the application of this thought. Gathering with his church fight club, men often tell stories of intentionally doing some type of chore or assignment wrong. Feeling there is no way to do the task right without being criticized, or being able to make any critical comment, why even try?
Passive aggressive men give in recognizing they’ll eventually lose the fight and she’ll correct whatever he did anyway, John added. Women who feel they’ve been critiqued go through fanatic efforts to teach their male partner to never critique them again.
As female writers, advertisers, marketers and others in media continue to increase their influence, and men who either stay silent or help push the stereotype continue using the perception in the name of ‘what sells’, men continue to see the media images of them grow in ways that are uncomfortable.
This is another guest post from my friend Larry Z’s blog. He is new to blogging and I am reposting his blog onto mine. I suggest that you go on over and sign up for his blog for an articulate thinking man’s blog. Here is the link
JUNE 15, 2012
Why are we tolerating child prostitution and forced prostitution in the United States?
Okay, this is not a news item in the sense that this appalling evil is not new in the US. What is news – or ought to be news – on the TV, radio, Internet, etc. is that there still has not been much reduction, not to mention eradication, of child prostitution and forced prostitution in the United States here in 2012. In recent months, I have heard of news stories about this ongoing atrocious injustice in Atlanta and in Las Vegas. It is widely known to be a chronic problem in the immigration depots of New York City and San Francisco. Forced (coerced) prostitution is not limited to those major cities, and American girls are being coerced into prostitution in addition to the poor girls from overseas brought into the country illegally for this.
To bring a little perspective on how destructive child prostitution is to the girls forced into it, I have heard, in a rare radio piece about this issue, that the life expectancy for many of these girls is just 22 years. So, death, at a very early age, is what awaits them after they have been forced to have sex with as many as ten to fifteen “customers” per 24 hour period for several days each week.
As Americans have a proclivity for lecturing the rest of the world on the subject of human rights, to avoid hypocrisy and to do the right thing, we need to act to eliminate the gross violation of these girls’ and young women’s human rights and of their dignity as human beings.
Regrettably, the demand for child prostitution remains high in our society. This is in itself a (damning) indictment of our culture. Let’s stiffen the penalties for the consumers of child prostitution, and more vigorously pursue and bring to justice the suppliers of it (organized criminals).
Let’s support the groups that are fighting against this terrible evil that ruins and destroys the lives of its victims.
Please contact your elected government representatives at both the state house level and in Congress in Washington. Let them know that you want the laws already on the books more vigorously enforced against those guilty of human trafficking and child prostitution (of American girls and of immigrant girls brought to the United States for prostitution). If federal monies are needed by some of the states to fight this evil more vigorously, then so be it. (It is past time we had a more serious and honest debate about what our national priorities should be and how to allocate resources to achieving those priorities.)
Thank you for reading and for your concern. Now, contact your elected representatives (by email, phone call, fax or paper letter), and please speak with your clergy and fellow church members to encourage them to speak out and to work against this infectious evil that is destroying the lives of so many girls and young women across the nation. And support groups (with your time, talents, and/or resources) that rescue and then help these abused, enslaved and exploited girls to heal and rebuild their lives.
Footnote: Recall the ACORN sting operation where a supposed Pimp went in to buy a house to start an underage prostitution ring and they ACORN worker saw no problem with it, this despite the so called WOMEN’S RIGHTS MOVEMENT. Can we spell liberal hypocrisy?